Students Talk Domestic Violence and Healthy Relationships
Last week was the first part of a three week session in which representatives from the Young Women’s Christian Association (YWCA) implement their Safe Dates curriculum for our Measures of a Man program.
The 6th grade session at Washington K8 started just like any other. Young boys filed in, one after another, nudging for the best seat in the library. They carried on small conversations underneath their breath until Rex and Danielle arrived. After a few preliminary exercises to get the conversation flowing, Rex invited students to get out of their seats for one last activity.
Then, Things Got Interesting…
Towards the end of the session students were asked to line up on one side of the library. This last game was called, “Should I Stay or Should I Go?” Students were presented with a variety of relationship situations and they had to make the decision to leave the relationship or stay and work it out. Rex even created a “limbo” area for when students couldn’t make the difficult decisions.
Situation 1 You’re in a great relationship and the other person gets really angry and pushes you into a wall. Should you stay or should you go?
After reading the situation, Brian, a taller, confident boy, strutted to the other side of the library. He was ready to leave while the remaining boys hung back. As Brian got to the other side of the room and turned around, he looked nothing less than shocked. “They’re gonna do it again. They might hurt you!” Brian exclaimed.
The remaining boys offered statements to justify their actions like, “you can work it out,” or, “if they do it again, then it’s a problem.”
Situation 2 You’re in an argument and your girlfriend calls you worthless.
Brian looked back at his peers and stood firm in his ground; he was leaving that relationship, too. As the boys shuffled about, one other boy, Colby, joined Brian stating, “They don’t care about you,” while the rest of the boys floated to limbo.
Situation 3 You’re in a relationship and your new girlfriend tells you she doesn’t like your best friend and you can’t hang out with that person anymore.
Again, Brian stood his ground. He wasn’t going to let anyone tell him who he could be friends with, because that’s what he values most. “It’s not my problem they don’t like them, but I wouldn’t leave my best friend,” he says. As Brian was again left alone to his side of the library, the rest of the boys started pouring in their side of the story. “But, you’ll be doing more stuff with your girlfriend,” they commented.
Situation 4 You’re in a great relationship and that person starts texting you every 20 minutes.
If you guessed Brian said he would leave that relationship too, then you’re right, but he wasn’t alone. Others joined him saying, “But I won’t be able to sleep,” or, “I couldn’t play my games.” Those who decided to work through the relationship made a promising argument stating, “She’s just trying to make sure you’re okay.”
Growing Together
Regardless of the outcome of the exercises, there is one thing for sure: these boys have a lot of growing to do. But the good news is Growing Kings will grow with them. And we’ll always be with the help of key partners like the YWCA. They help us start important conversations like these with our young boys. As our students grow and mature, so will the Growing Kings program. Next year, this same cohort of 6th grade boys will be a year older, with another year of life and experience behind them. And next year, we’ll be here. We’ll be waiting for them to shuffle into the same classroom, carrying on new conversations underneath their breath. And those same conversations will be put to rest when they see YWCA walk in and begin their session.
Tune in next week…
Over the next two weeks, YWCA will be visiting with all of our middle school students. We’d like to invite you to tune in each week to see what happens next.